FAMILY-GENERAL
In God’s
divine design, every “biological family” when converted to Christ becomes the
“church in miniature”…And as these families mature and reflect the fullness of
Christ, they become the strong building blocks of the church. In this sense, mature families automatically
create mature churches.
Elders and Leaders, Moody, 2003, p. 126.
The family
was God’s first earthly institution.
Before there was a government, and long before God instituted the
church, He ordained marriage and the family as the basic building block of
society. The destruction of the family
we are witnessing today is, I believe, a harbinger of the ultimate collapse of
our entire society. The more the family
is threatened, the more society itself is in danger of extinction. We’re living in the last days, and nothing
shows that more graphically than the deterioration of the family.
John MacArthur
Successful Christian Parenting, 1998, p. 217.
It is
difficult to see how Christianity can have a positive effect on society if it
cannot transform its own homes.
John MacArthur
Kent and
Barbara Hughes suggest the following to built family affection:
1. “The best possible foundation for
building affection: love for God…We are able to love God and others through the
reception of God’s love. Loving God is
what makes other loves endure. This
discipline, the day-to-day empowerment to live out this love for people who
aren’t always “lovable,” is what fosters the ongoing growth of affection.”
2. “It is essential, then, if a family is
to develop the bonds of affection, that the children have the assurance of
their parents’ love for one another.”
3. “An obvious place to enhance family
affection is at the dinner table. That
is the single best daily opportunity families have for all gathering
together…We encourage you never to surrender that choice time, for it is an
unsurpassed opportunity to build family life.”
4. “Family vacations were at the heart of
building the Hughes clan’s affections…we made disciplined investment in family
vacations…Sometimes brief, spontaneous mini-vacations can (also) have important
results in developing family unity and affection.”
5. “Mutual interests builds
affection…Wise parents know this and look for a common interest or adopt their
children’s interests as their own.”
6. “Families that learn to appreciate
their points of uniqueness and to chuckle at their idiosyncrasies pull together
in affection rather than apart in irritation.”
7. “The home is the place to be
sentimental, corny, even weird for the sake of
affection.”
8. “Wise parents who wish to enhance
familial bonds will do their best to keep up the communication with
grandparents and spent time with them if possible. Few things can be more elevating to family
than loving affection extended across generations.”
Kent and Barbara Hughes
Disciplines of a Godly Family, Crossway,
2004, p. 30-42.
We have
experienced substantial joys in professional ministry, but nothing is quite so fulfilling as the personal joy of seeing family friends
come to faith… The family is at the very heart of authentic ministry and
evangelism. As ministry professionals,
we hold the firm conviction that family is ministry and that the most effective
spread of the gospel occurs through family.
We are also convinced that we were never more effective in evangelism
than when we had children at home.
Kent and Barbara Hughes
Disciplines of a Godly Family,
Crossway, 2004, p. 86- 87.
A vital
element for building a family is instilling a healthy sense of heritage – an
appreciation of family roots, both earthly and spiritual. Yet it is increasingly common in our world
for children to have no such sense of continuity or regard for family
history. Too many feel that they have
come from nothing and are bound for nothing- and this goes for Christians,
too. Family heritage is a subject of
neglect that is in need of rehabilitation.
It is one of the disciplines of a godly family.
Kent and Barbara Hughes
Disciplines of a Godly Family, Crossway,
2004, p. 21.
The family is
supposed to be our training ground in this loving authority. It is a “ramping-up” place that God has given
us to learn love, respect, honor, obedience, and trust, in order to prepare us
for relating to others and ultimately to God Himself.
Mark Dever
Nine Marks of a Healthy Church, Crossway,
2000, p. 228.
In the
family, life is brought not only to our doorstep, but into our kitchens,
bedrooms, and dens. In the family, life
is happening all around us, and it begs to be questioned, evaluated,
interpreted, and discussed. There is no
more consistent, pregnant, dynamic forum for instruction about life than the
family, because that is exactly what God designed the family to be, a learning
community.
Paul David Tripp
Age of Opportunity, P&R
Publishing, 1997, p. 41-42, Used by Permission.
The Christian
family was the bulwark of godliness in the days of the Puritans; but in these
evil times hundreds of families of so-called Christians have no family worship,
no restraint upon growing sons, and no wholesome instruction or
discipline. See how the families of many
professors are as dressy, as godless as the children of the non-religious! How can we hope to see the Kingdom of our
Lord advance when His own disciples do not teach His gospel to their own sons
and daughters?
C.H. Spurgeon
Only a Prayer Meeting, Christian Focus
Publications, 2000, p. 12.
The roles and
responsibilities in a household according to Scripture – Fathers: Provide for
family/children (2 Cor. 12:14) and ensure proper nurture and discipline (Eph.
6:4; Col. 3:21; Heb. 12:6). Mothers: Raising of
children/motherhood (1 Tim. 2:15) and managing the home (1 Tim. 5:14).
Children: Obedience to parents (Eph. 6:1-3; Col. 3:20) and care for parents in
old age (1 Tim. 5:8).
Andreas Kostenberger
God,
Marriage and Family, Crossway, 2004, p. 123.
Remember
always that your work or ministry or position dare never keep you from your
family. If you fail them, you fail your greatest
responsibility – and you are a failure in life.
Ted W. Engstrom
The Making of a Christian Leader, Zondervan,
1976, p. 118. www.zondervan.com.
Living
in a time when the family is under attack, the real danger is idolizing the
family. We hear “the family first” and may be tempted to say “amen.” But Jesus
will have none of this. When the family is first, God plays second fiddle.
Wynn Kenyon
Family Traits, Tabletalk, March 2007, p. 14. Used by Permission of Ligonier
Ministries.
Every
Christian family ought to be a little church, consecrated to Christ and wholly
influenced and governed by His Laws.
Jonathan Edwards
An
ideal Christian home ought to be a place where love rules. It ought to be
beautiful, bright, joyous, full of tenderness and
affection, a place in which all are growing happier and holier each day. There
should never be any discord, any wrangling, any angry words or bitter feelings.
The home-life should be a harmonious song without one marring note, day after
day. The home, no matter how humble it is, how plain, how small – should be the
dearest spot on the earth to each member of the family. It should be made so
happy a place, and so full of life, that no matter where one may wander in
after years, in any of the ends of the earth – his home should still hold its
invisible cords of influence about him, and should ever draw resistless upon
his heart. It ought to be the one spot in all the earth, to which he would turn
first, when in trouble or in danger. It should be his refuge, in every trial
and grief.
J.R. Miller
Homemaking, 1882.